Tuesday, 24 July 2007

Slight Drizzle

This morning I was walking the dogs around the block when I noticed that rivulets had formed by the roadside. I tutted disapprovingly at the waste of precious desert tap water before I remembered that it had in fact rained this morning for a whole hour! I'd forgotten what roads look like after a downpour; it's normally so dry here.

Not so back in the good ol' U of K. It's wet there. It's been pissing down for weeks. Britain's up to its necks in what the marketing department has asked me to refer to as 'aqua'. It's clearly kicking-out time on a Friday night in the bit of heaven over the British Isles. Yes it's wet.

There have been suggestions that this punishment from above is actually, er, punishment from above. The Torygraph naturally thinks it's Gordon whose got God's divine back up. Meanwhile, in 'England's medieval town of Tewkesbury', some believe this is God being nice which makes me wonder just how medieval things are in Tewkesbury.

The truth is that books that are to blame for his holy wrath. The UK is a literary hell-mouth with a long tradition of pissing off the almighty in print. Whether it's Denis Wheatley, Jackie Collins or Salman Rushdie you can be sure that Britain's blasphemous book writers are the envy of the world. Take this concise book review:
"Harry Potter is an evil book intended to trick people into believing that witchcraft is pure fiction. This way they will be off their guard and will more readily begin experimenting with things like Dungeons and Dragons and the like. Rowling may have written those books, but she didn't author any of the HP books. The devil is the one and only author of those books. Rowling created HP by a process known as automatic writing which is a form of channeling. After each sessions she probably had carnival relations with him."
Guess we're all going to hell in a tea cup.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That's the first Harry Potter review that's actually made me want to buy the bloody thing.